I Don’t Want the D


No, not that D.

D as in depression.

It feeds every one. Rich or poor, adult or teen. Even the happiest person you see. It picks anyone it can.

Unlike most people, it does not feel like another person is inside you wanting to go out, No.

It feels like nothing is inside you anymore.

You can’t feel anything, can’t be excited about anything. You once cared so much, but now, you just don’t give the slightest damn about anything.

The things that made you feel happy, things that make you excited, things that you crave, all of these things don’t have an impact with you anymore. They are just things meant for other people. The ones that don’t understand there is no point to it all.

Hours go by like a torture, you just want it all to stop. You can’t take the feeling of not feeling at all.

I don’t want this D.

But it found me and it won’t go away.

I often find myself staring at the blue-green veins on my wrist. Tracing it carefully, pinning the thickest one with my fingers and taking in a deep breath.

I never wanted this D.

I tried to sleep it off. Taking sleeping pills by pairs, then more and more everyday. No matter how many I take, I still wake up.

I never wanted this D.

I just want it to end.

Depression

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