Amongst the Crowd


All things outside my home amuses me, especially the people.

I prefer going out with earphones blasting beats drowning the voices in my head, it keeps me at peace, it keeps me sane.

Every step, oh so careful. Though not looking down, all my senses are alert. My eyes moving around at a rapid pace, you’ll think I’m worried that someone is following me. Yet I am smiling.

I am always curious what other people are thinking – crossing the street, inside the mall, going to and from their every day destination.

Who among you have sinned? Who are thinking such lewd thoughts you are disgusted at yourself yet you can’t help it?

Who are running away? Who are in love? Who are broken?

Who are holding on a thread and fighting for one more day?Who have decided to end his/her life today?

Every so often someone will catch my eye and hold it for a short moment. Oftentimes, they will look away immediately – suddenly conscious of the situation. Awkward.

But there are those moments that someone will linger, stare so strong you could feel it even from the back. You’ll turn around and stare.

Why are you watching me? Are you observing? Are you looking for someone? Are you a spy? Assassin?

Are you reading my mind?

I cocked my head and think of how easy it would be to break your neck. Watch as your sweat rolls down sweetly and imagine my hand tracing it down your face. Look how your lips form a smile and how I would bite it gently, tugging it playfully until you give in.

But no.

I better go.

Amongst the Crowd

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